Emotional Intelligence: The Number 1 Leadership Skill in 2024
But what exactly is emotional intelligence?
Your university degree is not enough to make a splash into the world, even if you graduated from one of the world’s top education institutions.
There are qualities that you don’t get taught neither at university, nor at school. These are the soft skills that are currently highly in demand in the workplace.
Soft skills are at the heart of emotional intelligence.
If you’re missing general knowledge about life, people might say you’re dumb and send you books to read and learn from.
But if you can’t read emotional cues or lack basic understanding of the human nature, you might actually get in trouble when it comes to:
- getting promoted
- finding a partner
- selling to customers
- securing funding
- acquiring a team
Effective communication comes down to great analytical skills coupled with enhanced emotional intelligence. Those who have low emotional IQ will have trouble communicating their needs or expectations in a manner that allows for true connection and this will block their growth in their personal and/or professional life.
The question is — what exactly is emotional intelligence?
Emotional Intelligence
Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, writes:
“In a very real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels”
Emotional intelligence is the aspect of your inner wiring that helps you manage your emotions, feelings, thoughts and sensations in a healthy way, so that you can have a clear understanding of yourself and how you relate to others at any given moment.
According to Forbes, there are 5 key components that set the tone for emotional intelligence:
- Lifelong learning (or growth mindset)
- Resilience
- Empathy
- Team skills
- Self-awareness
The best part is that just like your analytical skills, your emotional intelligence can be nourished and increased over time as long as you continue to do the inner work necessary to expand and evolve.
Now let’s look at the 5 components of emotional intelligence!
1. Lifelong learning
Many have said this before Albert Einstein, most notably Socrates, but I’ll refer to his quote on this one:
The more I learn, the more I realize how much I don’t know.
Every day is an opportunity for growth: that’s the basis of growth mindset. You only need curiosity and a desire for learning to break free from any limiting beliefs and continue your personal development throughout your lifetime.
The more you learn and increase your understanding of the world, the bigger your chances to find belonging in a diverse group of settings, from work and friendship circles to society and global communities.
2. Resilience
While growth mindset can take you far in life, it’s the resilience of your spirit that will set you up for success.
How does one build resilience? You challenge yourself.
Once you become comfortable with being uncomfortable, the fear of trying new things will slowly disappear. This is the recipe for channeling more of your limitless potential into the world.
Resilience is the result of wishful thinking in the middle of uncertainty as you give it your best shot to accomplish what you came here to do. Think of any career or relationship risks that you take as investments into building the life your Future Self is guiding you to create!
3. Empathy
There isn’t a more important ingredient to increasing your emotional intelligence than empathy.
Empathy allows you to:
- understand people’s differences
- listen to new perspectives
- form more balanced opinions
- relate to a bigger pool of people
- lead with increased adaptability
While empathy opens the door to new possibilities and connections, it’s important to set healthy boundaries to make sure that you don’t lose yourself as you’re trying to embrace the whole world.
The more you develop your empathy, the more you’ll connect to people in ways you haven’t imagined — just make sure that you don’t lose or ruin the connection you have with yourself as you’re trying to relate to everyone else.
It’s OK to be empathetic and still have disagreements with others. It’s actually healthy, too. Conflict resolution allows us to practice growth mindset side by side. Maybe the word “conflict” stirs up some weird or uncomfortable emotions, but remember that open communication is what shifts the narrative within any relationships.
4. Team skills
Mastering your emotional intelligence is not solely about yourself. It’s about being able to have meaningful relationships with others, which is the foundation for a fulfilling life on Earth (according to the longest study on happiness).
Our relationships — at home, with friends, at work, in society — shape up our view of the world and give us a positive or negative attitude.
What’s fascinating about developing your team skills is that you can enter a “grumpy” team and change the room temperature for the better with your “sunny attitude”. Humans have the power to raise the collective frequency or energy levels of a whole stadium: think of the football players or singers who have millions of people cheering and chanting for hours!
How are you showing up for others? What are things you can do to be a better team player? What are your expectations when it comes to team work and how can you communicate them in an effective manner?
These are some of the questions to consider as part of raising your own emotional intelligence and becoming a better collaborator.
5. Self-awareness
Finally, the ability to view yourself in all of your glory (the good, the bad and the ugly) is crucial for successfully increasing your emotional IQ.
There are many people who believe themselves to be empathetic and understanding, yet they operate in selfish ways. We can operate within the fixed mindset of our belief system with some serious superiority complex pre-dispositions and get away with it for years — until we actually meet someone who’s so self-aware, they inspire us to do our own inner reflection and take true accountability for our actions.
It’s important to mention that being self-aware is not about being critical towards your own actions, thoughts or emotions. It’s about learning how you actually feel and think and making sure that you honour all of your needs where they are based on a healthy belief system.
In the process of developing higher levels of self-awareness, you will inevitably discover some limiting beliefs and false narratives that need your uprooting ASAP. Save some empathy for yourself and your progress in life — one’s self-growth journey is a privilege and quite the adventure if you allow it to be fun and fluid.
Our world has gotten a lot more complex and so have we, this is all part of the natural evolution of our beloved planet Earth. One day at a time, we’ll crack the code as to what it truly means to be human — I’m sure of it.
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